The "F" Word

👉🏼FAT👈🏼 this is a word I have struggled with my whole life, ever since that dumb boy made fun of my “fat legs” in 2nd grade.

When the word FAT started being talked about more in the body positive community I had a really, REALLY hard time with it. I’ve been working on it. But this one word has probably been the hardest thing for me to be accepting of.

I spent most years of my life trying not to be FAT and hoping no one would ever call me FAT again. I watched every woman on TV, in the movies, and in my life talk about being thinner.

Growing up, I saw NOT ONE woman on a magazine who didn’t represent “perfection” - even now, while checking out at the grocery store, I still see magazines with thin women on the cover, advertising how to lose that last 10 pounds.

I started hearing about “fatphobia” - those speaking about it were also the ones celebrating fatness. I wasn’t sure how I felt about people using the word FAT in a positive way.

How could people possibly use this word, the one that hurt me and ruled my life for so long, positively?

Then it hit me. I was fatphobic.

In the past I had been so terrified of being FAT - the word that our society taught us was bad. So much so that I would do almost anything to avoid it.

I’ll be honest. At first It made me uncomfortable to see fat activism and fat bodies in social media - but I couldn’t figure out why.
This is why.

I was so obsessed with weight loss and so convinced that BEING THIN = BEING HAPPY that I literally couldn’t handle seeing other women celebrate their bigger bodies.

It didn’t change until I finally started accepting myself in my current body, which is FAT.

The next time you find yourself uncomfortable when you see fat bodies being celebrated, ask yourself why.

I’ve been on the upward side of body acceptance for awhile but I’m finally starting to really embrace this word... FAT. To me, it can mean strong, beautiful, smart, kind and yes, even healthy.

Maybe, just maybe by the time my daughters grow up there will be realistic depictions of “perfection” in media. That is my hope.