HOW TO BE THE PERFECT MOM
Being a mom is hard. Being a first time mom is SO HARD. This has been heavy on my heart lately... and I just want to say: To the first time moms out there struggling just to get a shower, it gets better. I promise.
So to make us ALL feel better, and maybe even smile... I've compiled a list of what I think the internet & social media has told us we MUST do to be a good mom (and I'm calling BS on it)
THE PERFECT MOM ACCORDING TO THE INTERNET
1. COOKS fresh meals for her family. This one kills me. The guilt I have over this is something I can barely explain. A few years ago, I worked really hard to get myself on a meal planning routine that was gluten and dairy free, and I felt incredible. I cooked almost every night, and hubby and I loved it. But then I got pregnant and was sick the whole time. And, then I had a baby. Since then, I have yet to find a balance between life & motherhood where I have time and energy to cook often. I'm trying... I really am. But it's a struggle. Let's just say, I never thought I'd be the mom who lets her child eat half the stuff she does. Not something I'm proud of, but to me it is more important that she's getting the calories she needs. (She's picky, so it's not like I can cook her some fresh carrots and baked chicken). My husband works late, and by the time we settle in for the evening it is 9 or 10 pm. I've been getting better at throwing healthy meals together lately, but goodness it is hard!
2. NEVER has a messy house. Seriously - how often do you see pictures on the internet of a messy room? It's not something anyone really wants to show off, but can we just admit that our homes aren't perfect? If you have children, and you really think your house should be spotless all of the time, that would mean you would literally spend all day cleaning up after them. Also, it affects your relationship. "No babe, I can't spend time with you right now because I have to finish the laundry, do the dishes, etc etc." Sound familiar? I hate a messy house - but I have a messy house 90% of the time. #halp
3. EXERCISES. Don't get me wrong... I absolutely love to work out. I really do. It gets rid of my anxiety & stress and makes me a better, happier person. But can someone PLEASE tell me how to fit it into my schedule AND budget since I'm not rich?! Side note: I am not a work out at home type of person. Tried it, can't seem to stick with it. There are a ton of online fitness coaches out there and I think its great that they've been able to make money from doing something that they love while getting to stay at home with their kids. But, sometimes, it feels impossible to keep up with the super mom who lost all her baby weight in 3 weeks. To some of us, this seems so unattainable making us shut down even more, rather than motivating us. How about we talk about the moms, like myself, that absolutely LOVE to work out... but haven't seen the gym in months. Like... I literally, cannot figure out right now how to make it happen. And that's okay. Maybe next week. ;)
4. ALWAYS LOOKS GOOD. Ummm... Nope. If you watch my Instagram stories then you'll see --- I rarely have time to wash my hair, dry shampoo is my bestie, and I often forget to wash my face at night. Oh, and PS... I fall asleep in my clothes more often that I'd like to admit. Am I proud of these things? Haha! No... but, ya win some ya lose some. Most days I choose sleep over a shower, and I'm okay with that.
5. DOESN'T NEED MUCH SLEEP. See those rockstar moms on social media that seem to do it all? When do they sleep?! If I don't get the things done that I want to get done, I get very overwhelmed and depressed. I don't fare well from a 'lazy day'. It usually does more damage than it does good. However, I also don't do well with the pressure to be perfect. At the end of the day, if the house isn't clean and I would rather sleep, I am going to sleep. If you've been going through these same struggles, I urge you to LET GO a little bit and see what happens. Guess what I learned when I let go?
The dishes can be done in the morning. Sleep is important.
We casually scroll through our social media feeds and see what looks like the perfect life. The mom who has it ALL figured out. But you know what? None of us really do. So quit being so hard on yourself. Trade out the late night cleaning session for a chat with your husband. Play with your kids and clean it up tomorrow. I'm not saying to be lazy; I'm saying to take care of yourself and know that we are ALL trying to figure this thing out.
That was pretty much a rant, so I'll just go ahead and say END RANT.
On another note, can we talk about how perfect this hat is? Yes, it says 'MOTHERHOOD: WINGING IT' Get it here! Weestructed is one of my favorite shops - my next purchase will be the RAISE GOOD HUMANS hat fo' sho'
The top I'm wearing is by SBJ AUSTIN in a size 3, c/o of Tootsies in Atlanta, one of my favorite local high end boutiques. If you check them out, ask for Maya and tell her I sent you! I love shopping there when I want higher end, but a different variety than the Fab 4 (Bloomies/Saks/Nordstrom/Neimans). More information on Tootsies here.
My purse came from Tootsies as well - it's Rebecca Minkoff and to get this exact purse you can call them and they'll ship it to you! Otherwise, you can find it here in brown.
My jeans are the BEST... seriously, worth every penny. Flattering for all body types. I'm wearing the 'good legs' style in a size 16. Get them here!
My shoes are my go to slip on sneakers - classic Chuck Taylors. Get them here!
Enjoy these pics of me and & best girl... and to the mama's out there, be kind to yourself and let go a little bit.