THE BEAUTY OF GETTING UNCOMFORTABLE
This post is paid for by Walmart, and also contains affiliate links. Thank you for your continued support of House of Dorough, and understanding I only share things I truly love with you.
Taking these photos wasn’t easy. I had to climb into a rocky river, knowing I’m not as strong as I used to be and knowing that I could easily slip and fall at any moment.
On top of that, I was wearing a two piece swimsuit which is never actually as easy as it looks. To be honest, two piece swimsuits are usually more comfortable for me because finding a one piece that fits my torso right is near impossible. But I am always a little more self conscious.
So once I reached the rock and got a handle on my balance, I heard some squeals from above. I looked up, and there was my husband, and my two precious daughters. They were sitting on a bench that over looks the river. He shouted to me, “Emmie wanted to watch you!” and then, Emmie herself shouted, “Be careful, Mommy!”
And then, I began posing and shooting pics and as I did this, they kept waving and cheering me on.
What a powerful moment of clarity this was for me.
Was this the most comfortable situation for me to be in? No.
Did Walmart require that I buy a two piece bikini and flaunt my body in the river for this ad? Absolutely not.
But what I’ve been learning is this.
It’s the only way to truly grow in this journey of self love and self worth.
In these moments of discomfort… look for the beauty. It’s everywhere. Running on the beach in your swimsuit to chase your kid, and you’re uncomfortable thinking about your body jiggling around… worried that people are watching you? How about the beautiful fact that you’re a good mom, out there playing with your kid. Do you know how many people, if they really are watching you, you’re motivating (no matter what size they are)? You have just become an inspiration to a stranger and you had no idea.
Your uncomfortable moments may be very different from mine, but for me this means that hopefully when my kids grow up they won’t remember the mom who would shy away from scary things. That wouldn’t take her coverup off. Hopefully, they’ll remember that time their crazy mother got in the river in a bikini and they won’t even think twice about my body size or shape at the time.
Lately, I’ve also been thinking a lot about my husband and how much he supports me. Sure, he has always been supportive of the blog and etc. But when it comes to me owning my body, I wasn’t really sure how he would react in the beginning. I am not in the habit of ever really asking him for permission for things, but I did give him a heads up when I participated in This Is Postpartum (seen here and here). The day it went live, he told me how proud he was.
I don’t take these compliments well because I’m not ever doing these projects for the likes or for the pride. But it meant a lot to hear him say those words. He has never ever ever made me feel insecure, and he has truly only encouraged me when I’ve been down about how I look. Even after giving birth, when we oftentimes feel the most “wrecked” — he tells me how beautiful I look and how amazing this body is for giving him his children.
So in that moment, with the rushing waters so loud behind me, and my foot starting to slip on the rock… when I looked up and saw them all waving and smiling at me… I got chills.
Chills because sometimes I can’t believe that this is my life. That these are my people. That even though I’ve hit rock bottom a few times in life, God has helped me overcome it all and blessed me with this.
Get uncomfortable. Take it all in. Grow.
These are the words on my heart today.
I don’t love spending a lot of money on trendy bikinis, and Walmart has so many of them! I’ve done a little roundup here for you to shop! Once again, always floored at the collection available for such good prices. They’ve really stepped up their fashion game (especially in plus sizes) and I am not complaining! I am loving the We Dress America collections seen here.
MY BIKINI INFO
Wearing THIS TOP in a 2X and THESE BOTTOMS in a 3X. This suit runs generous though and I could have done the 2X in bottoms. Also, side note this entire swimsuit is like $8 all together. WHAT?! The quality is great too.